Hey peoples,
My name is Esther and I’m a grateful recovering lust addict, sober since January 4th, 2021.
I know I only have 7 months of sobriety under my belt, but I’m grateful to be part of this amazing program for almost 3 years now.
I was trying to think about what I can write to y’all – something that’s meaningful to me and helpful to others. I thought – why not God? He is the reason we’re all here; sober, or not.
Now, I honestly don’t know much about Him, as He is one of a kind. Each person’s God or Higher Power is unique to them. But I bet that no matter what you call Him/Her/Them, they will always be there to guide you.
When people tell me that they tried turning to God but didn’t get an answer, I feel that they weren’t looking for AN answer, but rather for THEIR answer.
Let me explain by sharing my experience.
Many moons ago my old sponsor had me write a letter to God every night for a week, as part of my Step 2 (This was the greatest gift she ever gave me). When the week was over, I continued. I felt so much more connected to my Higher Power when I was chatting with Him.
As usual, life got in the way and I stopped writing regularly, but every time I had a serious problem or I was anxious, I would sit down and write a letter. No matter what it was about, I always walked away knowing my next steps, even if it wasn’t an exact answer to what I was looking for.
These letters were never formal. I wrote them the same way I’m talking to you guys now, ‘cause God’s my buddy (with superpowers, of course). I figured I’d write a short one now, so you can see exactly what they look like:
Dear God, As You know I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed with all the changes going on in my life now. I mean, I’m ridiculously grateful for this vaca[tion], ‘cause you know better than me how much I need it, but you give me time to think, which can be bad and good. Even though you know all this stuff, I feel like I should get it out on paper. So I’ve been thinking about how awesome it is that I’m sober and happy even with all this #@*∞⚓! in my life. (not sure I’m allowed to curse in my article …lol) But I’ve also been nervous for when my vaca is over and I have to find a job, a roommate, and possibly start dating again. Wait a minute - my vaca isn’t over! I still have 24 more hours to bathe in sunlight and go swimming and relax. I need to be present in the moment. I should finish my step one and get to sleep early cause, after all, what’s the point of vacation without rest. I guess we’ll chat again next week and talk about my struggles. In the meantime, I’m gonna go get a tan. It’s been real. ❤ Esther
I hope you can take something from my letter, and if not, that’s OK, ‘cause I enjoyed writing it.
Can’t wait to see you in our meetings, when you choose to stop in.
Careful though – you may want to stay 🙂
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